Friday, December 19, 2008
从前，从前，有个人爱你很久
刮风这天，我试过握着你手，但偏偏，雨渐渐，大到我看你不见，
还要多久，我才能在你身边，等到放晴的那天，也许我会比较好一点。
从前，从前，有个人爱你很久，但偏偏，风渐渐，把距离吹得好远，
好不容易，又能再多爱一天，但故事的最后你好像还是说了拜拜。。。
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Friday, December 12, 2008
loads of thoughts
recently had been chatting with a couple of friends about life in general. we've shared some very private parts of our lives with each other and i'm truly thankful to have friends who trust me enough to let me know about their personal secrets. i can't be that bad a person if people can trust me with such information, can i?
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'i want to spend loads of time with you'
....
'can or not?'
'can.' :) - 10 dec '08
thank you very much for taking time away from your book and spending loads of time with me; for having to take public transport coz the weather did not permit you to ride; for having to get out of the house though it was raining; for keeping your promise. let's read together again ok?
just have to get used to the loud slapping sound of your slippers. lol.
i'm so going to miss you.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
'i want to spend loads of time with you'
....
'can or not?'
'can.' :) - 10 dec '08
thank you very much for taking time away from your book and spending loads of time with me; for having to take public transport coz the weather did not permit you to ride; for having to get out of the house though it was raining; for keeping your promise. let's read together again ok?
just have to get used to the loud slapping sound of your slippers. lol.
i'm so going to miss you.
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Tuesday, December 09, 2008
i wish...
that things were different
that time can rewind
that all the things you said were true
that i were more in control
of myself
of my life
that you wouldn't change
that you would stay
always
oh how i wish.
that time can rewind
that all the things you said were true
that i were more in control
of myself
of my life
that you wouldn't change
that you would stay
always
oh how i wish.
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quote of the day
Sunday, December 07, 2008
regrets
我会永远支持你的
突然间心血来潮，想用华文写blog。现在的时间是凌晨三点二时分。
在开始输入这次的entry 的时候，发现自己的华文水平已不如往日。不知道到目前为止已犯了多少错误。有点对不起过去的华文老师，甚至有点惭愧自己以前还是念过中国文学的。说了别人都还不相信呢。lol.
再过两个小时就是 standard chartered 的马拉松赛跑。有好几位朋友今年参加了这项活动，甚至还有至少其中一位好朋友报名参加了全程超过四十公里的赛程。对跑步过敏的我来说，的确非常意外新加坡有那么多人似乎非常热衷于这项活动。早知道有那么多人参加，就叫朋友 jio 我咯。
今天和一位朋友 msn 的时候，我告诉他我多么希望能下去支持他。他竟然回了一句 'for what'，让我心痛。虽然你不希罕，我还是会永远的支持你的。:)
ah di 加油！
Labels: exercise, friends, life
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Thursday, December 04, 2008
i've been bitten...
in more ways than one. :)
posted so many entries at one go. just suddenly felt like blogging. perhaps i might feel melancholic enough to start writing poetry again.
nov/dec have always been a nostalgic time for me. many things happen for me during this period every year - the best kind and the worst. perhaps it is because i have nothing much to do, and therefore more than enough time to think. my mind is the worst enemy i have. i am too paranoid, too imaginative. sometimes i make myself expect something, then get disappointed greatly if it does not materialise. no expectation = no disappointment. but what is life without a little hope?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
*为了让你高兴嘛 :) - 27 nov '08
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
i grow attached to people very quickly, sometimes too quickly for my own good. and i am always very paranoid, wondering if they have O.D.ed on me yet. i like surrounding myself with people that i love. whenever people ask, is it better to love someone or to be loved, i always choose the former. because i do not believe that many people love me. i am not very loveable and i cannot believe that people find me love-worthy.
i can love many people at the same time. when i love, i love hard. and when i love, i tell them i love them. that is why i have gotten burnt many times, why i have died many times. but i am like a child that never learns. when i get hurt, i go out and do the same thing again. and get hurt. again. whenever someone i love leaves me, part of my heart dies.
please don't leave me.
posted so many entries at one go. just suddenly felt like blogging. perhaps i might feel melancholic enough to start writing poetry again.
nov/dec have always been a nostalgic time for me. many things happen for me during this period every year - the best kind and the worst. perhaps it is because i have nothing much to do, and therefore more than enough time to think. my mind is the worst enemy i have. i am too paranoid, too imaginative. sometimes i make myself expect something, then get disappointed greatly if it does not materialise. no expectation = no disappointment. but what is life without a little hope?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
*为了让你高兴嘛 :) - 27 nov '08
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
i grow attached to people very quickly, sometimes too quickly for my own good. and i am always very paranoid, wondering if they have O.D.ed on me yet. i like surrounding myself with people that i love. whenever people ask, is it better to love someone or to be loved, i always choose the former. because i do not believe that many people love me. i am not very loveable and i cannot believe that people find me love-worthy.
i can love many people at the same time. when i love, i love hard. and when i love, i tell them i love them. that is why i have gotten burnt many times, why i have died many times. but i am like a child that never learns. when i get hurt, i go out and do the same thing again. and get hurt. again. whenever someone i love leaves me, part of my heart dies.
please don't leave me.
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my life story
i have always had this impression that the older one gets, the more difficult it is to make good friends.
people are more guarded, less trusting, more jaded, less spontaneous, more suspicious, more cynical. they have been hurt before and are less willing to believe that sometimes people are really what they seem.
this doesn't seem to hold true for me.
i remember as i was growing up, way back in primary school, i was somewhat of a loner. recess times saw me spending time alone by myself. i didn't even join anyone at the tables to eat. poor me would always stand aside by the railing, munching away on a sandwich or bun, looking down at my school field and running track. on hindsight, i realise i must seem like one of those emo kids we see so often nowadays, minus the eyeliner and moody self-shots. it's a wonder i didn't grow up into a dysfunctional teenager/psychopath killer. i didn't keep in touch with anybody from my primary school days, most probably because no 'real' friendships were forged. primary school was a torture.
by the time i reached secondary school, i still hadn't shaken off the big spectacles and geeky look. however, i was lucky enough to make the acquaintance of a few people, who later on became my very good friends. i didn't really belong to any particular group/class of people. my class had very distinct categories - the intellectuals, the 'cool' people, the brainy + cool people, the outcasts. anyway, i plodded along and managed to survive secondary school.
jc was the most liberating period of my life. firstly, i went to a school that was far away from my home. having spent 10 years in the same school previously became a bit of a bore. secondly, i had a fantastic bunch of people as my classmates during the first 3 months of my jc education. i still keep in touch with the same bunch of people till now, more than 10 years after we've graduated. those days were also the first time i went overseas with my friends. i miss my jc days the most.
nus days passed quickly, even though i spent four years there doing my degree + honours. i don't remember mugging for exams, since i am not much of a mugger. the library had a way of making me sleepy after a few minutes of reading my notes. even though i was from FASS, i was not a typical girl from that faculty. many of them made an effort to look nice, wearing nice clothes, makeup etc. i went to school in berms and sports sandals, and never skipped a single lecture or tutorial. lol. frankly speaking, i don't remember much of my days there. i just drifted along, and four years later, graduated, albeit not with fantastic results.
the next couple of years of my life were spent doing what i do best - bumming around. did things that i never thought i would do, made my mum cry a lot. it was like i was a rebellious teenager, although by then i wasn't exactly a teenager anymore. i went out with people i met online, made friends that i never thought i would ever make, went drinking, stayed out really late. mum was so worried that my uncle noticed it, and tried to talk to me. that was quite a down period in my life. i had turned my back on God then, didn't believe in Him and couldn't understand a lot of things. i can't believe i am writing all this now. brings back so many memories.
of course i did not tell my uncle what was happening. and most of my friends did not know either. it was a tough period, not just for me, but for my mum especially. and at that point in time, i did not care who i hurt. i am such a terrible person. i realised i was capable of being cruel, and that there was a side of me i never realised could exist. it still exists now, although if people know it, they might judge me and stay away. my deep, dark secret.
by 2004, i had woken up sufficiently to start taking my life seriously. was finally gainfully employed. but the end of 2004 saw me taking another plunge. oh well.
anyway, over the next three years, i was relocated to various zoos, for various reasons. went through many ups and downs, but through it all, i was very thankful for the many friends i have made among the different zookeepers. it is afterall not true that growing old makes it more difficult to make friends. my latest bunch of newfound friends are as fun-loving as any other. perhaps it is because we have a shared history (one month spent together surely makes a difference). i cherish each and every one of you and i really hope that come next year, our friendship will still be as strong, if not stronger; that gatherings will not become a thing of the past; that everyone makes an effort to remember each other.
ah, now you know more about me.
people are more guarded, less trusting, more jaded, less spontaneous, more suspicious, more cynical. they have been hurt before and are less willing to believe that sometimes people are really what they seem.
this doesn't seem to hold true for me.
i remember as i was growing up, way back in primary school, i was somewhat of a loner. recess times saw me spending time alone by myself. i didn't even join anyone at the tables to eat. poor me would always stand aside by the railing, munching away on a sandwich or bun, looking down at my school field and running track. on hindsight, i realise i must seem like one of those emo kids we see so often nowadays, minus the eyeliner and moody self-shots. it's a wonder i didn't grow up into a dysfunctional teenager/psychopath killer. i didn't keep in touch with anybody from my primary school days, most probably because no 'real' friendships were forged. primary school was a torture.
by the time i reached secondary school, i still hadn't shaken off the big spectacles and geeky look. however, i was lucky enough to make the acquaintance of a few people, who later on became my very good friends. i didn't really belong to any particular group/class of people. my class had very distinct categories - the intellectuals, the 'cool' people, the brainy + cool people, the outcasts. anyway, i plodded along and managed to survive secondary school.
jc was the most liberating period of my life. firstly, i went to a school that was far away from my home. having spent 10 years in the same school previously became a bit of a bore. secondly, i had a fantastic bunch of people as my classmates during the first 3 months of my jc education. i still keep in touch with the same bunch of people till now, more than 10 years after we've graduated. those days were also the first time i went overseas with my friends. i miss my jc days the most.
nus days passed quickly, even though i spent four years there doing my degree + honours. i don't remember mugging for exams, since i am not much of a mugger. the library had a way of making me sleepy after a few minutes of reading my notes. even though i was from FASS, i was not a typical girl from that faculty. many of them made an effort to look nice, wearing nice clothes, makeup etc. i went to school in berms and sports sandals, and never skipped a single lecture or tutorial. lol. frankly speaking, i don't remember much of my days there. i just drifted along, and four years later, graduated, albeit not with fantastic results.
the next couple of years of my life were spent doing what i do best - bumming around. did things that i never thought i would do, made my mum cry a lot. it was like i was a rebellious teenager, although by then i wasn't exactly a teenager anymore. i went out with people i met online, made friends that i never thought i would ever make, went drinking, stayed out really late. mum was so worried that my uncle noticed it, and tried to talk to me. that was quite a down period in my life. i had turned my back on God then, didn't believe in Him and couldn't understand a lot of things. i can't believe i am writing all this now. brings back so many memories.
of course i did not tell my uncle what was happening. and most of my friends did not know either. it was a tough period, not just for me, but for my mum especially. and at that point in time, i did not care who i hurt. i am such a terrible person. i realised i was capable of being cruel, and that there was a side of me i never realised could exist. it still exists now, although if people know it, they might judge me and stay away. my deep, dark secret.
by 2004, i had woken up sufficiently to start taking my life seriously. was finally gainfully employed. but the end of 2004 saw me taking another plunge. oh well.
anyway, over the next three years, i was relocated to various zoos, for various reasons. went through many ups and downs, but through it all, i was very thankful for the many friends i have made among the different zookeepers. it is afterall not true that growing old makes it more difficult to make friends. my latest bunch of newfound friends are as fun-loving as any other. perhaps it is because we have a shared history (one month spent together surely makes a difference). i cherish each and every one of you and i really hope that come next year, our friendship will still be as strong, if not stronger; that gatherings will not become a thing of the past; that everyone makes an effort to remember each other.
ah, now you know more about me.
Labels: friends, life, ramblings
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procrastination
after spending a good part of 3 hours yesterday posting the previous entry, i am currently feeling a great resistance to blog about the remaining part of the trip. was looking through my photos and realised there are still so many places to blog about... ah well, if i feel sufficiently inspired/bored enough, i will continue the second part.
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on another note, last night saw yet another 54th OCC gathering, this time round at jalan kayu. yes, it does seem that we seem to meet up mostly on wednesdays, isn't it? 19 nov was at bedok followed by mj at L's place, 26 nov was at east coast lagoon hawker followed by mj at M's place, and after last night's dinner of prata, we adjourned to M's place yet again for mj. why does everyone stay so far away... i love this bunch of people.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
on another note, last night saw yet another 54th OCC gathering, this time round at jalan kayu. yes, it does seem that we seem to meet up mostly on wednesdays, isn't it? 19 nov was at bedok followed by mj at L's place, 26 nov was at east coast lagoon hawker followed by mj at M's place, and after last night's dinner of prata, we adjourned to M's place yet again for mj. why does everyone stay so far away... i love this bunch of people.
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Wednesday, December 03, 2008
Europe 2006 Part 1: Italy - Rome, Florence, Venice, Verona
This is a long overdue post on the trip I took way back in 2006. Was sufficiently inspired by various blogs I have been reading recently to finally post something on it. Don't know how it will turn out yet...
This was taken at Changi Airport, waiting to board the flight. We still looked relatively refreshed at this point in time. By the time we made our transit at Dubai Airport, we were a little worn out. :P Shall not post any pictures of that since not very flattering. ;)
After God knows how many hours, we arrived at our first stop in Europe - Italy. After our first meal in Italy, we set off for the Vatican City.
As a Roman Catholic by birth, this is the absolute must-visit place. I was struck by the whole place. Felt so small and insignificant compared to all the great works of art and architecture. I've always loved Europe and the idea of Europe. If I have the chance, I would definitely go back again.
Our next stop:
We didn't enter the Colosseum. Didn't even know whether we could go in. One can only imagine the full grandeur of the place before it was devastated by fire. The place held many memories between its fallen walls, of gladiatorial games, animal hunts, executions. Such a beautiful place for such cruel events.
The Piazza del Duomo ('Cathedral Square') is a wide, walled area at the heart of the city of Pisa, Tuscany, Italy. It is recognised as one of the main centres for medieval art in the world. Partly paved and partly grassed, it is dominated by four great religious edifices: the Duomo, the Leaning Tower, the Baptistry and the Camposanto.
It was a great pity that by then night had fallen and so the Leaning Tower could not be captured in its full glory. Most of the pictu
res came out blurry. 
The next day saw us heading to Venice.
And of course, when in Venice, how can one miss the gondola ride?
This was taken at Changi Airport, waiting to board the flight. We still looked relatively refreshed at this point in time. By the time we made our transit at Dubai Airport, we were a little worn out. :P Shall not post any pictures of that since not very flattering. ;)
After God knows how many hours, we arrived at our first stop in Europe - Italy. After our first meal in Italy, we set off for the Vatican City.
As a Roman Catholic by birth, this is the absolute must-visit place. I was struck by the whole place. Felt so small and insignificant compared to all the great works of art and architecture. I've always loved Europe and the idea of Europe. If I have the chance, I would definitely go back again.
Our next stop:
We didn't enter the Colosseum. Didn't even know whether we could go in. One can only imagine the full grandeur of the place before it was devastated by fire. The place held many memories between its fallen walls, of gladiatorial games, animal hunts, executions. Such a beautiful place for such cruel events.
By the time we made it to the Trevi Fountain, night was falling and it was difficult to get a clear shot because it was dark and it was so cold... When I was there, I had no idea of the significance of this fountain. Now when I google it I realise it had so much history. Interestingly, there is also a traditional legend which holds that if visitors throw a coin into the fountain, they are ensured a return to Rome. Shucks. I think I didn't throw any coins in...
The next morning on our way to Florence, we spotted a familiar sign. :) Look at how cold it was!
In 1982, the historic centre of Florence was declared a World Heritage Site by the UNESCO for the importance of its cultural heritages.
Out of the many bridges one can see over the Arno River, one of them in particular stands out as being unique — The Ponte Vecchio (Old Bridge), whose most striking feature is the multitude of shops built upon its edges, held up by stilts. It is the only bridge in the city to have survived World War II intact.
Florence Cathedral.
The Piazza del Duomo ('Cathedral Square') is a wide, walled area at the heart of the city of Pisa, Tuscany, Italy. It is recognised as one of the main centres for medieval art in the world. Partly paved and partly grassed, it is dominated by four great religious edifices: the Duomo, the Leaning Tower, the Baptistry and the Camposanto.
It was a great pity that by then night had fallen and so the Leaning Tower could not be captured in its full glory. Most of the pictu
res came out blurry. 
The next day saw us heading to Venice.
And of course, when in Venice, how can one miss the gondola ride?
The poor lady in the same gondola as us couldn't have had that much fun. Venice isn't a good place to go if you have motion sickness.
The Bridge of Sighs (Italian: Ponte dei Sospiri) is one of many bridges in Venice. The view from the Bridge of Sighs was the last view of Venice that convicts saw before their imprisonment. The bridge name comes from the suggestion that prisoners would sigh at their final view of beautiful Venice out the window before being taken down to their cells.
St Mark's Basilica, St Mark's Square and the Bell Tower.
The next day it was off to Verona.
Don't know what the first picture is. :P The second one is the Arena, and the last one is actually Juliet's balcony. Verona is the setting of the story of Romeo and Juliet, made famous by William Shakespeare. Although the earliest version of the story is set in Siena, not Verona, a balcony falsely claiming historical connection to the fictional lovers has become a tourist attraction for lovers; the short passageway leading to the balcony is covered with slips of paper carrying their graffiti, and a bronze statue of Juliet stands under the balcony, one breast polished by those touching it for luck. I didn't touch it. :)
And with this, concludes the Italy part of our Europe trip. Took me 2hr 45min just to complete this post.
p/s: think the alignment is a bit screwed up. don't know how to fix it. oh well.
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Monday, December 01, 2008
Singapore Zoological Gardens
last thursday saw me at the zoo on my yearly visit. it was a good day, with the perfect kind of weather for a visit to the zoo - no rain, and not too sunny. it was the first time i went to the zoo and didn't meet with the rain at all.
upon arrival, we proceeded to fill our stomachs with kfc's shrooms burger meal (breakfast is the most important meal of the day!) before breezing through the entrance with our corporate pass (read: free admission!). after grabbing the brochure/map, we were rushing madly from programme to programme, trying to catch the different animal shows and feeding times. lol. how small is singapore, when you can meet a long-lost friend working at the zoo? hmm...
we managed to see almost all the different exhibits (so sad to miss out the reptiles :( ) including the infamous white tigers (a slightly higher number of people were at the enclosure, mostly discussing the recent incident). lunch was at kfc again (did we really spend 2 hours there???) and the rest of the day was a leisurely stroll to the remaining exhibits. nearing the closing time, the zoo became quieter, and it was my favourite part of the visit. no noisy children or big groups of tourists.
you mentioned that you have never been to night safari. if you want to, we could go together. :)
upon arrival, we proceeded to fill our stomachs with kfc's shrooms burger meal (breakfast is the most important meal of the day!) before breezing through the entrance with our corporate pass (read: free admission!). after grabbing the brochure/map, we were rushing madly from programme to programme, trying to catch the different animal shows and feeding times. lol. how small is singapore, when you can meet a long-lost friend working at the zoo? hmm...
we managed to see almost all the different exhibits (so sad to miss out the reptiles :( ) including the infamous white tigers (a slightly higher number of people were at the enclosure, mostly discussing the recent incident). lunch was at kfc again (did we really spend 2 hours there???) and the rest of the day was a leisurely stroll to the remaining exhibits. nearing the closing time, the zoo became quieter, and it was my favourite part of the visit. no noisy children or big groups of tourists.
you mentioned that you have never been to night safari. if you want to, we could go together. :)
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KTV
still remember that i used to visit the KTV more frequently back in the days at my first school. had a bunch of ex-colleagues who enjoyed singing and we would go whenever we felt like it. when i changed school, found another group of people who also loved singing. at my current school, i haven't found anyone who had the same level of enthusiasm yet.
so it came as a surprise when i found a new friend in my course who loved singing enough to do it almost all by himself for four hours straight. i learnt many new songs that day, and had fun. thanks for the great company. :) let's do it again sometime soon.
so it came as a surprise when i found a new friend in my course who loved singing enough to do it almost all by himself for four hours straight. i learnt many new songs that day, and had fun. thanks for the great company. :) let's do it again sometime soon.
