Wednesday, November 24, 2004
loads on my mind...
many things have happened over the past 10 days or so. things have progressed by leaps and bounds, an amazing speed, that sometimes leave me wondering in awe.
was pretty amazed by what had happened. but i'm glad, really. you're the best, you know?
i'll always love you, girl.
was pretty amazed by what had happened. but i'm glad, really. you're the best, you know?
i'll always love you, girl.
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Sunday, November 14, 2004
don't do this again
*dun tell me you're coming down to see me?!
haha... it was cute. sounded so incredulous. even more funny when you told me it sent you into a coughing fit. :P
*i wun disapprove of anything u do cuz it's u.
it must have been an irony when you got my mesg after that. :P
i was glad to go down, though it made me sad to see you looking so weak and tired... and still trying to be ga rang.
well, it turned out that the "fresh air" didn't make you feel better. in fact, you got worse after that. i could feel that you were still feverish. and it was rising steadily. sigh. so kelian. hopefully, after seeing your regular doctor, you can really recover nicely.
get well soon. we still have movies to catch and places to go.
haha... it was cute. sounded so incredulous. even more funny when you told me it sent you into a coughing fit. :P
*i wun disapprove of anything u do cuz it's u.
it must have been an irony when you got my mesg after that. :P
i was glad to go down, though it made me sad to see you looking so weak and tired... and still trying to be ga rang.
well, it turned out that the "fresh air" didn't make you feel better. in fact, you got worse after that. i could feel that you were still feverish. and it was rising steadily. sigh. so kelian. hopefully, after seeing your regular doctor, you can really recover nicely.
get well soon. we still have movies to catch and places to go.
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Saturday, November 13, 2004
39 degrees
you fell sick. i know you would try your best not to see the doctor and just let your own body fight it. but yesterday you were already very unwell, and although you became slightly better, your throat just got worse over the night. then you said you felt chilly. hugz. i would gladly have gone to bring you to the doctor. but i'm glad you said you're feeling better now.
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Tree Top Canopy
you asked me to join you. so i went. strangely enough, the short trek up to that canopy was a little tiring. the queue was horrendous!
the trek back to the car was so much longer. and my legs felt more wobbly than on the day i went cycling.
lunch at little india was nice. the ball-like thingie was yummy!!! *slurp* you liked the mango chicken more. the naan was the best! and the little "pouring" episode was so YOU. so was the not-helping-people-to-keep-watch-outside-the-toilet behaviour.
after lunch we took the train to marina bay, coz you wanted to be near the sea. there were many little boys and girls hanging around at the mrt station. we hopped onto the bus which was waiting just for our arrival and reached marina south. walked across the field to the shelter where you proceeded to plonk yourself down on the bench and just enjoy the breeze and the rolling heat waves. :P thunder was heard but nothing descended on us. when the sun went into hiding behind the clouds, we walked along a beaten path and the breakwater where we just sat and waited for the sun to go down. the rocks were hot! but it was nice just lying there and listening to my nice songs. ha. there were both your favourite song and my favourite song. you were harrassed by the mosquito at some point and you were very angry with it for doing what it did. :P but i know besides the harrassment, there was a lot going on in your mind. i couldn't read into your LHC but i know it was packed. sometimes, i have the weird feeling that i can read into it, but i choose to keep these in my LHC also. so won't know if correct anot.
after being stung by much mosquitoes and frightened by the horrible sea cockroach, we decided to grab some food. perhaps your falling ill was caused by:
unhealthy food at little india + fried kway teow + fried carrot cake + not drinking enough water.
you decided to take the train to dhoby ghaut and take a bus home instead. but lights blinded you! no fear, coz got the girls helped. :P haha... you actually got home and showered even before i finished showering although you missed some unidentified buses.
there was much to look forward to the next day. but it was disappointing. things didn't go the way they were supposed to have gone.
i slipped again.
the trek back to the car was so much longer. and my legs felt more wobbly than on the day i went cycling.
lunch at little india was nice. the ball-like thingie was yummy!!! *slurp* you liked the mango chicken more. the naan was the best! and the little "pouring" episode was so YOU. so was the not-helping-people-to-keep-watch-outside-the-toilet behaviour.
after lunch we took the train to marina bay, coz you wanted to be near the sea. there were many little boys and girls hanging around at the mrt station. we hopped onto the bus which was waiting just for our arrival and reached marina south. walked across the field to the shelter where you proceeded to plonk yourself down on the bench and just enjoy the breeze and the rolling heat waves. :P thunder was heard but nothing descended on us. when the sun went into hiding behind the clouds, we walked along a beaten path and the breakwater where we just sat and waited for the sun to go down. the rocks were hot! but it was nice just lying there and listening to my nice songs. ha. there were both your favourite song and my favourite song. you were harrassed by the mosquito at some point and you were very angry with it for doing what it did. :P but i know besides the harrassment, there was a lot going on in your mind. i couldn't read into your LHC but i know it was packed. sometimes, i have the weird feeling that i can read into it, but i choose to keep these in my LHC also. so won't know if correct anot.
after being stung by much mosquitoes and frightened by the horrible sea cockroach, we decided to grab some food. perhaps your falling ill was caused by:
unhealthy food at little india + fried kway teow + fried carrot cake + not drinking enough water.
you decided to take the train to dhoby ghaut and take a bus home instead. but lights blinded you! no fear, coz got the girls helped. :P haha... you actually got home and showered even before i finished showering although you missed some unidentified buses.
there was much to look forward to the next day. but it was disappointing. things didn't go the way they were supposed to have gone.
i slipped again.
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Pulau Ubin
it was a miserable day.
the physical aspect was still manageable. perhaps because you were there to help me push my bike and walk with me when i was too tired to pedal upslope.
*i won't let you die.
i was depressed that day. many things were going through my mind.
sitting at the obs property [where you killed that poor, unsuspecting caterpillar], looking at the reflection of the sky in the water.
thinking alot at chek jawa [*can i sit down?], gazing out to sea, at the sky where planes will pass through every once in a while, hearing your laughter drifting over.
my mind felt like bursting. either that or my heart was just going to shrivel up.
****************************
this sucks big time.
i couldn't take it on tue. off we went to wcp.
writing at clementi mac while waiting. words just flowed.
you brought along pics. ha! smiley smiley... :P errr... i really don't think it's a good idea to get those things again.
sitting on the bench staring out at the empty crafts bobbing lazily on the surface of the water. you said you couldn't read me. LHC perhaps? :) i have my moments too.
i was slowly healing. you were mending me. the cracks will still be there, but that can't be helped. it's like there's a knife poised permanently over my heart. everytime something happens, it will push in slowly, drawing blood. well, perhaps it went in a bit more quickly this time.
remarkable difference in my expression? i think so too.
ok, ok, we shall play frisbee there one day. :)
the physical aspect was still manageable. perhaps because you were there to help me push my bike and walk with me when i was too tired to pedal upslope.
*i won't let you die.
i was depressed that day. many things were going through my mind.
sitting at the obs property [where you killed that poor, unsuspecting caterpillar], looking at the reflection of the sky in the water.
thinking alot at chek jawa [*can i sit down?], gazing out to sea, at the sky where planes will pass through every once in a while, hearing your laughter drifting over.
my mind felt like bursting. either that or my heart was just going to shrivel up.
****************************
this sucks big time.
i couldn't take it on tue. off we went to wcp.
writing at clementi mac while waiting. words just flowed.
you brought along pics. ha! smiley smiley... :P errr... i really don't think it's a good idea to get those things again.
sitting on the bench staring out at the empty crafts bobbing lazily on the surface of the water. you said you couldn't read me. LHC perhaps? :) i have my moments too.
i was slowly healing. you were mending me. the cracks will still be there, but that can't be helped. it's like there's a knife poised permanently over my heart. everytime something happens, it will push in slowly, drawing blood. well, perhaps it went in a bit more quickly this time.
remarkable difference in my expression? i think so too.
ok, ok, we shall play frisbee there one day. :)
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FCP
your message came in saying your meeting had ended. off i went to meet you at dhoby ghaut. were you bored to tears waiting for me?
we went to one of your top 7/8 favourite places. sat in your favourite corner. ghost spider! i like your favourite corner coz dun have any mosquitoes ambushing there... :P
finally saw lightning rod on heritage tree! fascinating...
little india or geylang serai? after weighing all the pros and cons in your mind, you decided. little india it shall be! looking for the eatery you went to before, but it might have been the wrong one... :P "there's never been any seats upstairs!" said the girl with ice-cream.
puri with potato (though you kept insisting mushroom :PPP) was yummy! hadn't eaten that before. quite nice, though a wee bit oily. yummilicious!
walked around for a bit after dinner. a little similar to chinatown during chinese new year preparations, but the atmosphere was different.
you wanted to go kallang. but we couldn't find a bus to bring us there.
*you know what i feel like doing? i feel like just getting onto any bus.
and so we did. it brought us to tpy.
*my friends would never let me do that.
but i did. :)
things changed after we parted at tpy. i could sense there was alot going through your mind, especially since you were very quiet on the way home. knew you should have reached home long ago, but everything was quiet. was worried about you, but you said you were fine. even that didn't sound fine at all.
************************
the next morning, after i came out from church, my world came crashing down on me. i went through everything in a daze. i lost something very dear and precious to me. i grieved.
a part of me really did die that day.
we went to one of your top 7/8 favourite places. sat in your favourite corner. ghost spider! i like your favourite corner coz dun have any mosquitoes ambushing there... :P
finally saw lightning rod on heritage tree! fascinating...
little india or geylang serai? after weighing all the pros and cons in your mind, you decided. little india it shall be! looking for the eatery you went to before, but it might have been the wrong one... :P "there's never been any seats upstairs!" said the girl with ice-cream.
puri with potato (though you kept insisting mushroom :PPP) was yummy! hadn't eaten that before. quite nice, though a wee bit oily. yummilicious!
walked around for a bit after dinner. a little similar to chinatown during chinese new year preparations, but the atmosphere was different.
you wanted to go kallang. but we couldn't find a bus to bring us there.
*you know what i feel like doing? i feel like just getting onto any bus.
and so we did. it brought us to tpy.
*my friends would never let me do that.
but i did. :)
things changed after we parted at tpy. i could sense there was alot going through your mind, especially since you were very quiet on the way home. knew you should have reached home long ago, but everything was quiet. was worried about you, but you said you were fine. even that didn't sound fine at all.
************************
the next morning, after i came out from church, my world came crashing down on me. i went through everything in a daze. i lost something very dear and precious to me. i grieved.
a part of me really did die that day.
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Saturday, November 06, 2004
LP
have no idea why my arms are aching more today than yesterday. you were the one who had much exercise... :P
the weather decided the itinerary for us. WTC it shall be! searching for foodcourt but we ended up at iramen instead.
the longest silence we ever had. it was really loud.
worried about what? no, worried about who.
:) i knew, even before you told me.
why moody? coz i react to things around me. i was reacting.
your eyes literally lit up when i mentioned my aching arms. off we went in search of the arcade. i was very proud of you. it was all too easy for you. think those bunch of boys were impressed. :) haha.
you had to recharge. "i want to go to the sea." despite some minor obstacles from all the construction thingie, we hopped onto a bus and made our way to another place.
[singapore idol!!! the timing was impeccable.]
the walk into that place was nice. can be abit lonesome but was glad you were there. :) no lights along the road at one stretch, but was still very bright.
the sea! my ship! ah, so dreamlike, so magical, so much like the titanic. :P
pulau bukom and pulau bukom kechil. mini cities across the sea.
the jetty was really nice. and ya, i will always discourage you from sitting on the railings. although the water was gold and navy blue, at times it was black. and i don't want the black sea to embrace you.
it was nice to just sit there and take in the sights, sounds and smell of the place. the air was so fresh and yummy. i could sit there all night with you and not feel tired. it was so comfortable.
flashes of lightning brought up the topic of lightning rods. now i know trees have them too. learnt something new. :)
the climb up the steps was tiring. and the lights which were meant to light up the place were blinding and a total hazard. you seemed to kena all the spider webs and ant bites. so kelian!
when we went down via a different path and got sidetracked by the national parks office, i could sense very early on that you weren't very keen, even before we reached the toilet. then when you took a very abrupt turn without saying anything, i knew right away that something was wrong. it must be a really bad place. i could feel it coming off you.
it started raining after we boarded the bus. but have faith! became a drizzle instead.
although i took BL101 and MR101, i forgot to take TV101. but nevermind, i can still understand abit of what is going through your mind. i can sense it.
*the empty vessel that has been sent to carry some of your load.*
shall we go UK together one day?
i owe you two hymns. :)
the weather decided the itinerary for us. WTC it shall be! searching for foodcourt but we ended up at iramen instead.
the longest silence we ever had. it was really loud.
worried about what? no, worried about who.
:) i knew, even before you told me.
why moody? coz i react to things around me. i was reacting.
your eyes literally lit up when i mentioned my aching arms. off we went in search of the arcade. i was very proud of you. it was all too easy for you. think those bunch of boys were impressed. :) haha.
you had to recharge. "i want to go to the sea." despite some minor obstacles from all the construction thingie, we hopped onto a bus and made our way to another place.
the walk into that place was nice. can be abit lonesome but was glad you were there. :) no lights along the road at one stretch, but was still very bright.
the sea! my ship! ah, so dreamlike, so magical, so much like the titanic. :P
pulau bukom and pulau bukom kechil. mini cities across the sea.
the jetty was really nice. and ya, i will always discourage you from sitting on the railings. although the water was gold and navy blue, at times it was black. and i don't want the black sea to embrace you.
it was nice to just sit there and take in the sights, sounds and smell of the place. the air was so fresh and yummy. i could sit there all night with you and not feel tired. it was so comfortable.
flashes of lightning brought up the topic of lightning rods. now i know trees have them too. learnt something new. :)
the climb up the steps was tiring. and the lights which were meant to light up the place were blinding and a total hazard. you seemed to kena all the spider webs and ant bites. so kelian!
when we went down via a different path and got sidetracked by the national parks office, i could sense very early on that you weren't very keen, even before we reached the toilet. then when you took a very abrupt turn without saying anything, i knew right away that something was wrong. it must be a really bad place. i could feel it coming off you.
it started raining after we boarded the bus. but have faith! became a drizzle instead.
although i took BL101 and MR101, i forgot to take TV101. but nevermind, i can still understand abit of what is going through your mind. i can sense it.
*the empty vessel that has been sent to carry some of your load.*
shall we go UK together one day?
i owe you two hymns. :)
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Friday, November 05, 2004
princess diaries 2
"you got anything on ltr?"
at 1pm, my hp rang and the vibration made me jump in my seat. i couldn't answer the call coz my session hadn't ended yet. when i returned your call, you said, "we're all at block 5. come quickly!" but i was held up in the room for awhile. a few minutes later, you called again and said you were below block 2. when i went down, i didn't see you initially coz you were in someone else's car. when i got on, i had absolutely no idea where we were going.
"i'm going to kidnap you and sell you."
lunch at j.e. was an interesting affair. an unexpected lunch companion. but was ok overall. :) he could read you pretty well. =)
the downpour thwarted our plans initially. then you decided we shall watch a show instead. hah. duno if you really did enjoy the show though. maybe you were too cold to? :P
heater hands!
you're really allergic to arcades. my arms really aching today ah.... :P
*************
doing english assignment in lib now, but nothing to look forward to later. :) a hint? so clever...
at 1pm, my hp rang and the vibration made me jump in my seat. i couldn't answer the call coz my session hadn't ended yet. when i returned your call, you said, "we're all at block 5. come quickly!" but i was held up in the room for awhile. a few minutes later, you called again and said you were below block 2. when i went down, i didn't see you initially coz you were in someone else's car. when i got on, i had absolutely no idea where we were going.
"i'm going to kidnap you and sell you."
lunch at j.e. was an interesting affair. an unexpected lunch companion. but was ok overall. :) he could read you pretty well. =)
the downpour thwarted our plans initially. then you decided we shall watch a show instead. hah. duno if you really did enjoy the show though. maybe you were too cold to? :P
heater hands!
you're really allergic to arcades. my arms really aching today ah.... :P
*************
doing english assignment in lib now, but nothing to look forward to later. :) a hint? so clever...
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Wednesday, November 03, 2004
WCP
a HUGE piece of news dropped down upon me yesterday which left me in a state of trauma. it was something i had not expected. when you received your news, you seemed to hold up well enough. but when i received mine, i fell into pieces. i am thankful that you were there to put me back together.
we had a role reversal. i was supposed to be the tree. thank you for being mine instead.
the place was peaceful; my companion was the best.
casurina and bougainvilla; cannonball tree; eucalyptus tree; peacock flower; marsh; cockroaches, lizards and mosquitoes. you were my insect repellent last night!
time seemed to just slip by silently and quickly. it never seemed enough.
*the tip of the iceberg
*the door which is ajar but has the doorchain on
*slits appearing on the door and light pouring out from within the room -
the room you are in.
you are happy. therefore, i am. let me be, but at your own time and pace.
no matter what you face, no matter what happens, always remember: you never have to face it alone.
*joy shared is joy doubled;
sorrow shared is sorrow divided.*
thanks for saying what you did to address my insecurities. was surprised you would coz you mentioned before that you dun say easily.
sometimes it's abit hard for me to adjust. you seem very different depending on who is around. but you're somehow still the same. blow hot, blow cold? nah, nastily nice. :)
He must have put us where He did for a reason. and somehow we're not that far away from each other. there's much to look forward to. much.
we had a role reversal. i was supposed to be the tree. thank you for being mine instead.
the place was peaceful; my companion was the best.
casurina and bougainvilla; cannonball tree; eucalyptus tree; peacock flower; marsh; cockroaches, lizards and mosquitoes. you were my insect repellent last night!
time seemed to just slip by silently and quickly. it never seemed enough.
*the tip of the iceberg
*the door which is ajar but has the doorchain on
*slits appearing on the door and light pouring out from within the room -
the room you are in.
you are happy. therefore, i am. let me be, but at your own time and pace.
no matter what you face, no matter what happens, always remember: you never have to face it alone.
*joy shared is joy doubled;
sorrow shared is sorrow divided.*
thanks for saying what you did to address my insecurities. was surprised you would coz you mentioned before that you dun say easily.
sometimes it's abit hard for me to adjust. you seem very different depending on who is around. but you're somehow still the same. blow hot, blow cold? nah, nastily nice. :)
He must have put us where He did for a reason. and somehow we're not that far away from each other. there's much to look forward to. much.
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Tuesday, November 02, 2004
defense mechanism
is it a bad thing that your defense wall is lowered each time you are with me? am i like an acid that is corroding away your walls? or some vermin that is making life miserable for you? do you feel insecure about telling me all that you have told me? do you trust me?
i am your tree. and i shall shelter you. you may be my vine. i shall stand firm for you.
i am your tree. and i shall shelter you. you may be my vine. i shall stand firm for you.
